Arkham Dominates Pro Bowl
(Mistakatonic University Press) - Outgoing Grave Robber George Little sent a clear message to GM Neal F. Guye in last Saturday's Pro Bowl. "Now they can clearly see what they will be missing next season without me. I took on the league's finest and dominated them. I am the MVP in a game played by team MVPs. [screw] you, Coach Guye." Coach Guye declined to comment on Little's outburst. "It's my job to say nothing important while winning each and every game." Guye also modestly refused to comment on his play cotribution to the East defense. His scheme, called "Contain", was the workhorse that allowed the East to hold the West scoreless. It was called almost exclusively as the game wore on, paralyzing the West offense.
Kicker Trent Henley also contributed in the low-scoring Pro Bowl. "It was just like a game with Arkham. No one could score for [beans] and I managed to get through the uprights. Just another day at the office for me. I miss George."
(Mistakatonic University Press) - In separate news, Coach Guye hinted at a new era of reliance on the Arkham Malevolent Intelligence (AMI). "The AMI has been important to the franchise since its inception. Now we are preparing to take it to the next level. We're working 12 hours of the night, and every Sabbath, to make sure that the AMI is performing at optimum efficiency." Guye refused comment on the rumors that he will be replaced by the AMI. |
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